Linda Cube Again Is My Favorite Game I’ve Never Played
If someone stuck Pokémon, Dragon Quest, and 90s psychological anime in a blender, they might wind up with Linda Cube Again. It takes an already bizarre concept — saving animals from the end of the world by placing them on an ark-like spaceship — and dials it up to 11, throwing giant arm transplants and evil twins who dress like Santa Claus into the mix. It’s everything I’ve ever wanted in a video game.
I’ve tried to play Linda Cube Again on several occasions, and I’ve had to give up every time. The game’s entirely in Japanese, and is extremely text-heavy. I understand a little of the language, but nowhere near what I’d need to tackle something like this.
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Even though I have no shortage of games to play, I’ve never been able to get Linda Cube Again out of my head. So much about it fascinates me. It’s set on the dying world of Neo Kenya, a space colony that’s set to collide with an asteroid in eight years. Nothing can save it from destruction, and the planet’s gone a little crazy as a result.
Neo Kenya is robust in a way most RPGs can only dream about. It’s got everything you’d expect, but has a thriving black market as well. You can hit up the standard item shops, but you can also go to an underground dog-fighting arena or a vivisection clinic. Nothing is too strange for Linda Cube Again.
Image Source: ObscureVideoGames
But as time progresses, the world’s doomed nature starts to show. Once-thriving towns are abandoned, and shops and services are disappear. By the time you get to the game’s final years, nearly the entire planet has been evacuated.
As if this weren’t interesting enough, Linda Cube Again also has a branching story. You’ll have have to play the game at least three times to see everything, and there’s no shortage of things worth seeing. In addition to the aforementioned evil Santa twin, there are attacks by giant bugmen, men who have green-haired girls living in their chest, and a supremely stylish version of Hitler.
It’s not fair to call Linda Cube Again the best game I’ve never played. There are some bonafide masterpieces in my backlog; games that could change my life if I gave them the chance.
But it’s my favorite game I’ve never played, and it’ll hold onto that title until I get the chance to play it properly.
Someday, Linda Cube Again. Someday.